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City GirlWatch out, the recession-mongers are about. The science boffins dubbed last Monday the most depressing day of the year, couple that with the worst share slump since 9/11, with a 300-point drop at close of play, and it’s no wonder that a number of my colleagues indulged in much hand wringing this week.

But as the global share-price rollercoaster battled the waves, I’ve spotted an increasing number of my colleagues jumping on the hysteria bandwagon with a slightly “crazed but relishing the drama” glint in their eyes. On Tuesday morning, a girl screeched across the floor, “Delhi has suspended trading,” she was practically foaming at the mouth. But then we love a disaster in my office, remember Diana’s death, I had two people in my team request time off work to grieve, and no, they weren’t distant relatives.

But in her usual way, my boss decided on a novel approach to quell the “state of non-productivity” as she so affectionately ­defined it as. Yes, she called an impromptu meeting insisting that we Team Managers come up with a list of “reasons to be cheerful” that we were then obliged to take our teams through in a ridiculous attempt to boost staff morale.

So, while the big bad boy over at the Bank of England warns us the economy faces its toughest year for decades, my fellow managers mulled over the boss’s request, and with animated gusto, and lots of guffawing, here’s what they came up with:

1. Only a week until “Brucie Bonus Day” as January payday has been dubbed.  

2. Whisky Ken got battered on ­Dispatches. This was thrown in by my boss, prompting a resounding table slapping and hollering frenzy from staff.

3. Mortgage rates are bound to come down. Now we’re getting somewhere, this unusually observant offering coming from the HR manager.

4. Houses will be cheaper. Of course, the ideal opportunity to add to your property portfolio, I’m sure those with over-budget mortgages will be thrilled when I bandy this one in front of them.

5. And finally, the über reason that surpasses all others. Northern Rock’s shares went up by 46 per cent. Well, that’s all right then, we can all rest easy.

Friday 25th January, 2008 posted by City Girl
Guest_Martin says: Love it...especially number 2!!
Friday 25 January 2008 15:24



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